Taboo.

I’ve been thinking about being naked quite a lot recently. Why is it such a taboo? It’s such a shocking thing to be naked. I guess it’s all connected to how fascinated I am with the human body itself... we have all these bones and muscles and blood pumping through us... sometimes I’m just in awe of that. Skin we tattoo or scar or bruise, life stories written all over us and in how we move in our body language, how we make love, how we cry, how we react. How we find ourselves, explore ourselves and each other. I’m fascinated with nature.

Yesterday I spent a good few hours on the floor, in a room, naked, with my camera. It’s something I’ve had a habit of doing since I was about fifteen... and it’s a quite hard habit to explain, but it’s quite a big part of who I am in an odd way.

When I’m alone with just my camera and my body, it’s one of the few times in life I feel beautiful and free. I used to be very insecure about my body; in my early teens there was nothing I wanted more than to be skinny. I’d do things like pin my very thick black opaque tights to my bra in an attempt to make my stomach flat... I’d do this even when wearing jeans. I’d starve myself for about three days before each party. One time my friends confronted me about it while on the tube of all places, and I started crying. There are still days where I don’t want to go outside and confront the world because of how I look. I had a mini-break down on Friday because of this... sometimes I just want to hide away and never been seen again.


I think the first time I started to experiment with my own skin was when I finally felt contentment. It lets me explore myself and my flesh in a way I can’t usually. I am still not happy with my body (is anyone?) and I have a gym membership I can’t afford in an attempt to one day be, but I somehow manage to feel beautiful anyway when I’m just alone with my camera; which is how this photo came to be. It’s about my hobby. I am recently graduated from my photography degree, but for a large part of my degree I didn’t feel connected to my camera anymore. I lost my passion for just shooting for hours in the way I had before... but yesterday I had a damn good day with just me, this room and my camera. While in an attempt to get a different shot, I quickly shot this in the mirror. Its amateur which is why I like it... it’s how I started. It’s about how I connect to myself through my camera. It’s about experimentation and simply... being alone with yourself.